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Making Waves.
Verse One. The penguins were coming again. I thought I had lost them in the giant mushroom forest but that was clearly not the case. I could hear the slip slap of a thousand flipper feet growing closer as I knelt on the soft grass at the edge of the forest. My chest heaving from…
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Those Who Look For Beauty.
Should turtles be the definitive yardstick of beauty? I think so.
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Random Voices 2: The Revenge of Random Voices.
Sometimes the voices come in the morning and try to convince me they made breakfast.
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Random Voices.
They come to me at night. Constantly shouting about stuff I care little for. Why won’t they leave me alone?
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A Day In the Life of a Chronicle Reporter.
What do you do with a bunch of your favourite memes you stole from other people? Well, you write a weird story around them to somehow pass them off as your own work, even though they ain’t.
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Identifying Dogs From Piss Stains.
When will I find a use for my skills? I have talents and they are all just going to waste!
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Anne’s Lockdown Diary.
One tea lady, isolated and alone, attempts to create the perfect curry while avoiding being impregnated by gungy monsters.
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Elephant Elephantiasis.
Massive elephants are destroying the world with cakey feet! What in the name of all things squidgy are we gonna do?!
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Chickens Near Goats.
The illicit underground world of chickens near goats. Run to the hills!
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Poppadoms.
A stupid joke.